"Montreal Natural" Magazine October Issue
Why Can’t I?
Why is it some things never get done? I say I want to save money or pay off cards. Doesn’t happen. I know I should stop smoking, lose 15 lbs, exercise even a little. Why should this be so hard? What am I missing?
If my computer needs fixing, I know it’s no use to grab a hammer or a pair of pliers. It’s electronic. Needs a whole different approach. Electronics – what a mysterious art for most of us – the shadowy world of software, apps, error messages that make no sense. Need help here for sure!
Now maybe it’s the same with my mind. A shadowy world. Do I really know my way around in it? Where to get help? Lot’s of free advice. Cheap. But does anyone really know?
Well, we all know there are two parts to the mind. The first part is my “wide-awake-mind” that I’m using to read with right now. And then there is what is called the subconscious mind – that shadowy part again. Dreams. Things I can’t remember but then mysteriously appear when I stop trying. Sometimes really troubling things like an irrational fear.
Ellen came to see me at age 45. She was terrified of spiders. It seemed that everywhere she went spiders would appear out of nowhere, out of the woodwork, out of trees. Awful. By leading Ellen gently to a hypnotic state that gave access to memories long forgotten, Ellen was able to return to a memory at age 2. She was on the floor playing with a spider. It was fun. What an interesting creature. How quickly it moves! Delightful. Her mother walked up to her just as Ellen popped the spider into her mouth. Mother screams. Reaches into her mouth and fishes out the spider. Continues to berate her. Ellen is terrified. And remains terrified for 43 more years. Until today when together we unlocked this memory and released its emotional charge. Ellen doesn’t notice spiders anymore. And if she does, they have no effect whatever. Nice.
This is what the Buddhists call “skillful means.” You don’t take a pair of pliers to fix your computer; you need to understand electronics; the tools are different. And if you don’t know yourself, you find someone who does. Friends who don’t know are not much help. Look for an expert. Check out their qualifications. What certification do they have? Check out the agencies that have certified them. Are they well-established, reputable?
Milton Erickson was one of the most famous and respected professionals of the last century who used hypnotic states to assist his clients. He believed that each individual has within them everything they need to fix their own problems. In order to reach the needed solution, you just need a little skilful guidance and then you fix the problem yourself. Hypnosis is not about imposing a solution; it’s about finding the solution and reinforcing it.
To illustrate this, Erickson tells a wonderful story of the time when he was a teenager and a runaway horse cantered into his family homestead looking for a drink of water. Clearly, it was lost. Since the horse was saddled already, Erickson hopped on and guided the horse back to the road. The horse knew which way to turn and galloped off. From time to time Erickson had to encourage him to stay on the road and not wander off into the fields. After four miles the horse turned into a farm. The farmer was delighted. “Where did you find him?” the farmer asked. “About four miles from here.” “How did you know to come here?” the farmer asked. “I didn’t know,” said Erickson. “It was the horse that knew.” Erickson concludes the story by saying that this is an example of the right way solve an issue in the mind. The horse knows; it just needs a little guidance. This is a key feature of Ericksonian hypnosis – skilful guidance. No manipulation. Perfectly safe.
Now what about those credit cards? Or those extra 15 lbs?
Just the tip of the subconscious mind rises out of the ocean of consciousness
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